Specifically anybody who by today’s standards considers themselves any combination of ultra-conservative, Tea Party, far right-wing, neocon, fundamentalist, religious right, and also my friend. I’m writing to you.
I’m confused. Are you what you say or what you do?
You aren’t a racist. I know that because you have friends and colleagues of other races and I’ve seen you be loving and charming and delightful to them.
You don’t support profit for profit’s sake and you’re not an anti-environmentalist. I know that because you’re appalled by the BP oil leak nightmare in the Gulf and what it is doing to the places where you and your family love to vacation and have made so many memories.
You don’t blame the poor and disenfranchised for their lot in life. I know that because you volunteer your time to causes that help others.
You support our democratic form of government and the spending required to provide us with essential services. I know that because your kids go to school here, you drive on the roads and fly in planes and eat the food that’s trucked in, you’ve been to the ER at least once and the library dozens of times. You probably vote and you might even walk in the park every now and then. I’m pretty sure you use electricity and water. You may even have accepted help from the government after a disaster.
You don’t believe in locking down our borders to our neighbors. I know that because you continue to employ undocumented Mexicans to clean your home and maintain your landscape, and you have several Canadian friends you enjoy visiting freely.
You aren’t a war-monger. I know that because you study and quote the teachings of Jesus Christ.
You aren’t a bigot. I know that because you love me.
So why do you keep quoting racist, profiteering, selfish, solipsistic, isolationist, war-mongering bigots? Why is it so important to you to keep that Fox-News-Glenn-Beck-Rush-Limbaugh-Sarah-Palin hate machine going when all your really personal choices — who you love and what you do — bear no resemblance to them?
Unless I’m wrong.
Do you use the N word in your head? Do you still own oil stock and do a secret happy dance when you get your quarterly dividend check? Do you believe people less fortunate than you are spiritually inferior and deserve whatever happens to them? Do you advocate closing our borders to everybody except your housekeeper, Canadians, and caucasian Europeans? Do you believe in your heart of hearts that people who don’t belong to your place of worship are going to Hell or, at least, not to Heaven? Do you think we should eschew freedom of religion for sects outside the Judaeo-Christian umbrella? Is it okay with you that we continue killing Islamic civilians because they are, after all, Muslims? When the curtain is drawn in the booth and there’s no one watching, would you vote to allow me the right to marry the person I love? Tell the truth: Have you ever said, “She’s gay, but…”?
I only bring these things up because I’ve heard you quote public people who frequently say them. If they accurately reflect your views, then by all means, speak up! I would hate for you to be judged unfairly.
So tell me, please. Who are you really?
#1 by Holly Jahangiri on July 6, 2010 - 2:03 pm
Thank YOU. You managed to put my feelings into words better than I’ve been able to, so I’m quite happy to share this and ask the SAME thing.
#2 by Bob Hughes on July 6, 2010 - 2:21 pm
“Like” is far too meager a description of how I feel about this post. Brava!!
#3 by Winter Huff on July 6, 2010 - 3:20 pm
Well said/well asked.
#4 by Suzanne on July 6, 2010 - 3:49 pm
Fantastic!
#5 by Maryanne on July 6, 2010 - 4:49 pm
Alice, Thank you! My sentiments exactly.
#6 by Vivian Zabel on July 7, 2010 - 8:18 am
Usually I don’t comment on comments or postings that usually cause distention, but this time, since no one left a comment except in agreement, I decided to give my opinion.
I guess I could debate your comments, list all the things and problems caused by “you” liberals, but you wouldn’t listen/read. Yet, you think it’s all right to generalize those who disagree with you as terrible, ignorant people. Hmmm … what’s wrong with that picture? I don’t blog about my friends who are liberals, some very far to the left, right, up, down, whatever direction chosen. I guess I don’t feel the need to justify my beliefs or reasons, nor do I feel a need to question what others believe. For some reason, I believe in the right for all to live and believe as they wish, as long as they don’t force me to change or make me feel lacking because I don’t agree.
I really try “to judge not, yet you be judged in like manner.”
#7 by Cam on January 27, 2012 - 7:52 pm
I don’t think she is judging anyone, just confused. She is not calling you ignorant or terrible, but wondering why you support those who enact the ideals above, when you don’t act that way yourself.
I actually would love to see a list of problems caused by “liberals”. I would listen/read.
#8 by Holly Jahangiri on July 7, 2010 - 8:50 am
I didn’t really see this as an attack on all conservatives or all Republicans, Viv, but rather on extremists within the Republican party, various religious denominations, certain talk show hosts and “entertainment news” media, and hypocrites who say one thing publicly but behave very differently in private. It IS confusing. I do have friends who fit this description (but relatively few of them). And as I said to Michael, on Facebook, I don’t see you described in this post; in all the years I’ve known you, I haven’t seen you act inconsistently with your values. If you see yourselves in it, that’s an issue for you to confront within yourselves.
#9 by Lisa Simpson on July 7, 2010 - 11:42 am
Love this! Don’t feel this is a Right or Left point of interest, this is humanity thing – all of the questions involved – and I feel if we look at either side of the coin we’d find equal components of distasteful actors. The questions A.M. brings up doesn’t beg the question ‘party responsibility’ to me.
#10 by Barri Burke on July 7, 2010 - 12:20 pm
I love this. Someone finally said what I feel but couldn’t express in words. I am so tired of Republicans vs. Democrats. Why don’t we just worry about our fellow man/woman?
#11 by Stacey on July 7, 2010 - 2:05 pm
This is off the top of my head, with some emotion driving my thoughts. I am not going to sit and check grammer… stream-of-consciousness and hopefully coherent.
I agree about worrying about the fellow man/woman. I do not agree with mandating worry and concern. I wish government were as small as possible, federally. I also wish that people were more willing to help those who need help without having to be begged or cajoled. Perhaps if the elusive, cloudy “Big Brother” weren’t hovering over all, our neighbors would become more neighborly and less selfish. Many folks think that they do not need to be involved in community, as “the government will take care of those who need it.”
I do not agree with everything that the far right pundits say. “Liberalism” has its own extremists; I hope that those of you leaning more to the left-of-center do not agree with all of the extremists, too. However, sometimes extreme thoughts, words or behaviors are necessary to drive a modest change. We are still free to speak in this country. If you do not like what you hear, change the channel. That is what I do when ANY media source gets a bit too one-sided and extreme.
I firmly believe in capitalism. I believe that it is our responsibility to better ourselves in the world. While I sometimes need to rely on federal or state programs, I do not intend to use those programs as my sole means of support. Catering to the programs is not my career goal. Yet, I see many who live only to have the support of “the system.” It is the family business for many folks, and has been for three or four generations. How is this fair to the average tax payer who is working daily?
Regarding immigration… what part of “illegal” is not understood? Fine, change the rules. But the rules are in place and should be followed until there is a change. I feel that Arizona has the right to restrict the influx of illegal immigrants if the federal government will not.
Just a few thoughts that have been jelling in my brain since first reading your blog. I resisted posting anything because I am tired of only listening to other people’s opinions and being disregarded as inflexible, old-fashioned or just plain wacko because I disagree. I honestly feel that trying to reach a point of moderation in opinion is futile. I am disregarded by my conservative friends because I am socially liberal. Same with my liberal friends because I am conservative in the sense that I believe that society should take care of itself and the government needs to back off. Our culture would return to a more interdependent nation if big brother would just back off!
Probably not well elucidated.
#12 by Alex on July 7, 2010 - 4:26 pm
WTGG! I think that when people hear simulacrum such as, “So how is that change thing working out for you?”, it triggers a recall some related personal experience, consequently attaches some meaning, and thereby creates an emotional sort of identity with the speaker. It’s a visceral associative identification thing that we should question but don’t because thought requires additional effort. Unfortunately many people vote using those connections. Clever are the politicians who never use meaningful phrases.
One of my strongest beliefs is that we need to teach logic and critical thinking as part of the public school educational experience. One should not be allowed to graduate from any high school in the United States without a fundamental understanding of critical thinking and logic.
#13 by Holly Jahangiri on July 7, 2010 - 5:27 pm
I wholeheartedly agree with you, Alex! Unfortunately, I’m not sure we’re going to win that battle with the Texas Board of Education…but let’s try, shall we? Nothing ventured, nothing gained!
#14 by Jody on July 7, 2010 - 8:34 pm
To Stacey – most people do not want to rely on government or philanthropic assistance programs, and certainly not for multiple generations. Unfortunately, there is a problem when the type of job one can get based on the education level one can afford (read: high school diploma = minimum wage job), doesn’t pay enough for the basics of life, let alone enough to help the next generation afford college. I recently learned that in some states, like Georgia, the Federal Minimum wage only applies to federal jobs, so the STATE minimum wage of $5.15 per hour still holds for non-federal jobs. To feed, clothe, and safely shelter a family isn’t possible on that, not to mention college. So the cycle continues. It’s not a choice, it’s a problem. Let’s not shoot the victim.
#15 by Stacey on July 7, 2010 - 9:43 pm
Jody, I have met many while sitting waiting in line at DHHS that refuse to work two jobs, or even one, when they can have another child and receive greater benefits and stay home (or in line). I can think of three women, in particular, who said once they learned that benefits would be reduced as their husband started earning more, their husband managed to get fired from his job. These men engineered this so that they could maintain the full benefits. The scale for the reduction of benefits is really quite generous, but the perception of having to “go it alone” scares people and makes them dependent on the system. The problem is not that the government does not do enough, it is that the government encourages the sense of need. There are so many hoops to jump through that there is little time to re-educate or train for a new job because of the number of hours spent waiting in line behind people who are going to try to get away with NOT bettering themselves as long as they can. There isn’t much of a sense of independence, ambition or pride when sitting in a DHHS waiting room. It is a sense of entitlement. It is wrong.
#16 by Ruth Almen on July 14, 2010 - 11:21 pm
Alice, thanks for putting such powerful and universal thoughts in to words. I too struggle with those who seem to love justice, wish for kindness, proclaim their desire to live more like Jesus and follow God’s teaching as best they can, and yet enjoy the atrocious spewing of hatred that comes from the mouth of some conservative pundits. I’ve seen these folks be kind, giving to those in need, and I want to believe that is who they truly are.
I’ve also watched people stand in line at the DHS window, for years and heard their stories and helped them figure out how to NEVER have to go through that again. Sure people take advantage; but it’s not just poor people. Taking advantage of an overextended family support system run by the federal government is not very lucrative, in my mind.
Thanks, again, for being a beacon out there, from shore to shore.
#17 by Sharon W. on June 7, 2011 - 5:12 pm
You have articulated some of the very problems I have with those people who say they’re conservative. I consider myself a moderate and am saddened by those on both sides who seem hell bent on having everything their way despite the cost.
I live in NYS, it’s a Welfare for Work state. There is no additional moneys for women who continue to have children. What you have is what you get and there is a limit on the number of years one can collect. The biggest drain on our social services budget is Medicaid. Providing healthcare for needy children and those on Social Security who make less than $800 a month and have serious health problems.
I’ve had friends who have joined the Tea Party and all of a sudden they don’t want to pay any taxes for schools. They’re even talking about preventing people who don’t own their own homes from voting. We have 5 senior apartment complexes in the city in which I live. If the TP does change the voting laws to exclude property owners from voting then they who have worked hard, raised families and are now paying rent instead of mortgages will no longer have a say in the direction their lives takes.
#18 by Lisa on February 11, 2012 - 7:40 pm
Well written, Alice! I too am confused when my conservative friends quote “haters” or criticize those who stand for justice and peace; it seems so at odds with their supposed principles. If only they knew they make me even more proud to be a liberal every time they do.